Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Hide Your Throat, Hide Your Neck Because True Blood is back!!

HBO's True Blood returns to a TV screen near you on June 26th!


The title is as catchy as I could make it on this glorious Wednesday afternoon and since there's no doubt it caught your attention --you You Tube/pop-culture addict, you-- I'll go ahead and pat myself on the back for creating a titillating title for your enjoyment.

After enduring an onslaught of cookie-cutter, angst ridden bloodsuckers for a year (I'm talking about you, Twilight and Vampire Diaries on CW!) I am all too ready to experience the harsh unbridled sexuality and won ton violence of True Blood, which makes its return June 26th, 2011 on HBO.

True Blood vampires are the type of vampire I grew up loving; vagrant yet independently wealthy undead on a mission for sustenance all the while being tortured by murky moral compasses and insatiable blood lust. I like my characters flawed but irresistible (Eric Northman, anyone?) I like the humans that co-exist with the vampires to either display a faculty-robbing fear of the vampire or an unrelenting desire to bask in the shroud of their enticing darkness. My vampires must either be  unapologetic, ruthless predators of the night or ruthless vampires of the night trying to suppress their murderous instincts all in the name of love--in a believable and entertaining way that doesn't involve sparkling  skin or teenagers with a penchant for flat irons.

Season 1 of True Blood ripped the colorful lifestyles of Bon Temp's dead and living from the pages of Charlaine Harris' Sookie Stackhouse series and slapped viewers across each of their faces with it all at the same time with no hesitation! It gave us our first delicious peek into the sultry lives of a town of unsuspecting yet magnetically attractive Southerners. It introduced the multi-cultural group of characters that boasted a supporting cast that surpassed the suggestion of their supporting cast label! To top it all off, all these attractive Southerners dabbled in just enough sex and violence to appeal to the darkness in us all--even we mild Midwesterners!

Last but not least, True Blood's debut introduced us to the seemingly innocent and good-natured Sookie Stackhouse who just happened to have the enviable talent of reading the minds of her friends, family, customers and the like--and where would Sookie be without the brooding southern gentleman Bill Compton by her side, licking his chops--irresistibly of course. These two, while I found myself staring daggers at them from time to time as they traipsed across the screen in some feverish embrace or yelled at eachother or saved one another form harm or had sex (all the time), really hit the spot. They are the dysfunctional foundation for a bevy of enthralling storylines--isn't that the point of a story? For it to ENTHRALL you? You don't even have to look at your Word-A-Day calendar today after reading this post! Enthrall- to captivate or charm. OR.....TO ENSLAVE!!! Okay enough of that.

Season 1 was a shocking yet seamless barrage of crazy plot twists, vivid violence, and naked bodies entwined in the throes of passion all topped off by a cliffhanger finale that left me beside my self with longing for season 2, and trust me when it came I was completely sated!

Season 2 convinced True Blood's growing fan base that it would not be one of those shows that jumps the shark after the first season, Mary Ann was an absolutely sweet villain, right? Oh yeah--this is a spoiler free review, the type I specialize in because there's nothing I despise more than a spoiler--well maybe I hate bad movies that somehow take the nation by storm while masterpieces sit forgotten and under-appreciated on the shelf more but I, as I often do, digress. So I won't spoil anything, I'll just let you know, just in case you're a little slow on the uptake and have failed to ingest the delicious witch's brew that is season 2, that Bon Temp is running thick with more than smokin' hot, blood thirsty vampires and the hot pant-clad hotties that love them!! HOT! HOT! HOT!

Season 3 wasn't my favorite but it still had me glued to my seat every Sunday night, it still kept me entertained, and it managed to stay as dark and unpredictable as always. I got enough Eric, Sam, Tara, and Lafeyette to keep me satisfied for eons to come, and vampire politics aren't half as dry as human ones.

I love the show, and in about ten days, I will once again immerse myself in the delicious drama-filled lives of Bon Temps' addicting residents!! Season 4, welcome to air!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Quintessential I'm still blogging blog post.

So I'm sitting here watching a horrible reality show that shall not be named (yes I'm ashamed of myself I did create a blog post under the passionate exclamation "Scripted Television Only") and I remembered that I haven't blogged in a million years. Do not be alarmed, life has been coming at me at breakneck speed because I have decided to become an adult. Just kidding I've been an adult since I stopped believing that America was racism-free. What a lesson I learned!

Anyhow, I have no thought provoking gems of knowledge to drop, but I can't leave that damn Patriot Act dish up there (down below now) could I? More pressing issues have arisen, I haven't even taken the time to follow up with that Patriot Act to see how it's doing these days, but I digress.

My focus is shaky but taking its time and developing into a delightful juggernaut that is born of necessity. Reality bites some sooner than later. But I digress again.

What's with all the digressing? I mean, the more digressing than usual?

What am I kidding? This damn post is about Final Fantasy 12! Take a gander through this blog. I've been playing this game exclusively for nearly two maybe three years! I thought I passed it the other day and then wham! I have to go fight something some damn where else! I am a bit obsessive compulsive about video games so I won't be able to enjoy another game until I trounce FF12, but I'm simultaneously sick of the game and driven to beat it, which means long periods of time pass between my sessions with the game. If  I played it every day for about three hours a day I might get it done, but I've been playing it for sooooo looong, I've fallen out of love but am too loyal to it to leave it incomplete and collecting dust on the shelf!!

bakanaartist's rendering of FF12 characters (and my faves) Fran and Balthier.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow I'm going to beat it. Who wants to wager me? I can't even imagine finishing it anytime soon, remember I'm playing it THOROUGHLY! Killing marks, finding Espers, fnishing side quests, sprawling catatonic on the floor! I'm playing through every inch of the game, well maybe the last thing isn't in the game but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.

I talk about myself a lot. I'm an American, so sue me.