Tuesday, October 12, 2010

What if your computer combusted?

I mean it, what if it burst into flames while you sat before it with your fingers punching its keyboard? What then?

Better yet, what if the Internet went down--everywhere! No Internet at all, no Internet to find out what is wrong with the Internet, no Internet to look up phone numbers, no non-television news broadcasts or articles. Everything would revert back to the old times, would it not? Phone books would rise again in popularity, people would once more use their couches for more than just necking. Landlines would spin with the traffic of a billion phone calls, more than the lines have seen for at least fifteen or twenty years. People would go outside to hear things by word of mouth rather than by typed word, rather than by a vociferous image. Not to mention you would have never laid eyes on this masterpiece of a blog!!!! Things would be completely different!

So, that's why once a month I plan to research any given topic (or suggested ones) by using the lost art of Library/Book research. Yes, I'm going pull my library card from my wallet, sign on to the Tiger Library Catalogue (Toledo represent!) and look up books on those subjects that are in need of thorough elaboration!! Mind you, I can use only the database version of the catalogue, not the Internet version (<--if available, I'm going overboard now, right? I'll probably use the online database:)) At any rate I'm going to write down the dewy decimal number with a short stubby under-sharpened pencil on a slip of scrap paper. I will then wander up and down rows, staring up at the cataloguing numbers, using my God given talents of sequential recognition to make my way to the proper Dewey- Decimal clad row of books!! I will count, look up and down to match the number to my slip of paper, and either find it and rejoice, or stare dumbfounded at book binders that brandish numbers that aren't even close to the one that I seek hoping to find it misplaced among the row!

Rinse and repeat as needed.

Hurrah for book research!!! Topics anyone?

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